20 Reasons Credit Cards are Worse than The Other Woman

We all know that the two biggest things that couples fight about are sex and money. You may think that sex has the potential to be the bigger problem of the two since the problem of cheating spouses is one which has been breaking up marriages forever. However, the money issue may be sneaking up on you from behind and destroying your relationship from the inside out. Credit card problems and the debt that they can create are significantly worse on relationships than sexual indiscretion.

Credit cards can ruin relationships in a number of ways. They create debt which causes stress which damages the connection that the two of you have. In trying to decide how to use them and how to pay them off, you may create conflict which can be insurmountable. And when it gets to the point where one of you is lying about what you’re spending, you know that you’re in really deep trouble. Even worse is when someone who you thought loved you ruins your financial situation by racking up debts under your name. Combining lives is difficult; combining financial lives is often impossible.

Here are twenty reasons that you might want to think about cheating on your romantic partner before you think about messing up the marriage with credit cards:

1. The other woman can be made to go away. We’re not saying to hire a hit man. But there are plenty of cases in which infidelity is discovered, the affair is terminated and the relationship moves on. Credit card problems aren’t so easy to get rid of. You will probably spend your entire relationship talking about money, dealing with debt and figuring out how not to hate each other in the process.

2.Your feelings about money are more complex than your feelings about sex. It’s easy to know what you feel when a lover cheats on you: jilted. You’re angry, you’re hurt and you’re sad. The issue of money is never quite so clear-cut. You have been accumulating feelings about finance since you were little and probably have a whole slew of conflicting emotions about it. You might not know quite what you feel about the credit card situation. And even if you do, you might not be skilled in bringing it up because we aren’t taught to talk about money like we’re taught to communicate about infidelity.

3. Not everyone will be on your side. Tell your buddies that your girl cheated on you and they’re all going to commiserate and feel that she was the one that was wrong. Tell them that you’re having trouble agreeing on balance transfers and joint credit card accounts and you’re not going to receive quite the same emotional support. They’re probably all going to have an opinion but they aren’t all going to be on your side.

4. The other party isn’t as likely to feel guilty. Let’s face it; guilt goes a long way towards getting you what you want. Someone who cheats on you knows that what they did was wrong. Someone who spends a little bit too much money on a credit card that you’re trying to pay off probably isn’t going to be quite so convinced that they did something that wronged you.

5. You’re more likely to notice an affair. Although some couples engage in great communication about their finances, most aren’t so good at doing so. Because of this, a lot of money secrets are naturally kept. This can make it much more difficult to detect that there’s a problem and much harder to nip it in the bud. Most women find it much easier to notice that something’s amiss in the relationship that hints at the possibility of an affair.

6. It’s easier to move on. So someone cheats on you. You cry into your pillow for a few nights. You eat too much ice cream. You go out with your girlfriends. And you move on. It’s not so easy when someone has affected your financial life. You might not even be able to afford that much-needed ice cream!

7. You can’t blame the credit card for the problem. Frankly some people get over affairs by blaming the other woman. They decide that she seduced her husband, it wasn’t his fault and they move on. It may not be the best resolution but it works for some people. You’re not going to find it so easy to blame the credit card for the financial problem you’re facing with your spouse.

8. You can’t ask the credit card for an explanation. Likewise, women sometimes find that getting the story straight from the other woman makes them feel like they’ve gained some resolution. Your credit card is going to have sealed lips if what you’re seeking is a heart-to-heart.

9. It’s not always clear cut when you’ve crossed the spending line. It’s pretty easy to know when you or your spouse has violated the commitment of your sexual relationship. For some couples even a kiss is too much and for others the extramarital affair is only a problem if both partners don’t know about it, but no matter what the rules, the couple has probably discussed them extensively. The credit card spending line is rarely so clearly drawn in the sands of your relationship.

10. Financial problems may be more damaging to your kids. There is no denying that the romantic problems of parents have a long-lasting impact on children. However the financial difficulties of a relationship ruined in the credit department may be more significant. In the immediate sense, your kids may not have food to eat or clothes to wear. In the long term, their college educations could be compromised.

11. Credit card spending may be a symptom of a more serious problem. An affair is usually just an affair. Or it may be a sign that something is wrong in the relationship itself. But it’s highly unusual for it to represent a bigger problem such as a sexual addiction. Credit card problems are often indicative of other major problems that require money including drug habits, gambling problems and plain old financial irresponsibility.

12. A commitment to solving the problem will actually separate you. When you commit to dealing with infidelity, you usually commit to spending more time together to rekindle that romantic flame between the two of you. In contrast, a commitment to dealing with credit card problems is probably going to require you to spend more time apart. If the issue is debt, you’ll need to work more and go out for entertainment less in order to pay it off. This means that you’re going to have to get really creative to keep that flame burning.

13. Credit cards tattle on the other woman. It’s easy to figure out that your spouse is cheating on you if you share joint accounts and he’s using them for dates or gifts to someone else. You might not be ready for that kind of information just yet. In contrast, the other woman is going to keep her secret as long as she can. Sometimes that period of ignorance can be bliss.

14. An affair isn’t going to impact your retirement. In most cases, a philandering husband isn’t going to require that you dip into savings accounts and retirement monies to resolve the problems at hand.

15. Spurned women move up in their careers; indebted women take desperate jobs. Women who have been cheated on frequently want to stay out of relationships for awhile and they commit their extra time to moving forward in their careers. Women who are dealing with debt problems often work overtime and take second jobs that aren’t so appealing to get themselves out of financial trouble.

16. An affair won’t leave you homeless. It’s not too common that a man cheats on you and then kicks you out of the house. And if it happens, there are divorce attorneys to help you make sure that you get a home. It’s not so easy to get help from an attorney if your financial situation leaves you facing home foreclosure.

17. Your credibilty is compromised. When someone cheats on you, it’s something that has been done to you and which you probably couldn’t help so your credibility as a person stays intact. In contrast, if you get into financial ruin because of your relationship, you’re going to find that your credibility as a borrower is severely compromised. You become a financial risk which in some cases (such as if you’re in the military) can even impact your career.

18. A broken-hearted woman gets dates; a financially desperate woman does not. If the relationship does come to an end, you’re ultimately going to want to date again. A woman who has had her heart broken may toss out some warning signs but they’re not nearly as bad as those sent by the woman who has nothing to lose financially.

19. You’re not going to jail because of an affair. In extreme cases, relationships that involve credit card problems result in some kind of criminal activity such as credit card fraud. This can create a lot of trouble for you that might result in being brought up on criminal charges. Unless you do something awful to the other woman, you’re not going to risk jail time because your husband cheated on you.

20. You can’t divorce debt. If you can’t resolve the philandering issue, you can always just get divorced and move on with your life. Debt racked up on joint credit cards (or worse yet, on your cards alone as a result of a spouse’s financial decisions) doesn’t go away in the divorce settlement. Ruined credit will follow you around long after you’ve ditched the honey that was sleeping around and moved on with that part of your life.

Next time you’re thinking about taking that joint credit card out for a spending spree, you might want to consider the damage it’s going to do to your relationship. Get $20 out of the ATM and go buy a drink for a hot stranger instead.